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Get Over Yourself!

Grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. Keep it handy, you’ll need it shortly.

What should “I” do?
What will happen to “me”?
Where is “my” career headed?
What if “I” fail?

Just for a moment, call to mind your greatest achievement – something you feel very proud of. This could be something you were openly acknowledged for – or not. Got it?

On your page, in the first column, list all the ways you made this achievement happen. What skills did you employ? What qualities such as courage or tenacity or leadership did you display? Who were you to be able to do this?

Pretty remarkable you are!

Now, step back a bit. Continue reading “Get Over Yourself!”

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Are you a control freak?

Before you answer that, call to mind someone who fits your definition of “control freak” to a tee. Got it? Are you imagining someone who:

  • always has to get their way?
  • bosses everyone around because they know the “right way to do it”?
  • is uber-organized with everything always in its place?

If so, it is possible you don’t spend lots of time with this person if you can help it.

In my personal experience, however, as both controller and controlled, I’ve found much subtler methods of control. Imagine: Continue reading “Are you a control freak?”

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Leadership is a Gift

In The Art of Possibility by Benjamin and Rosamund Stone Zander we find:

Today was exceptional in that I learned leadership is not a responsibility-nobody has to lead. It’s a gift, shining silver, that reminds people huddled nearby why each shimmering moment matters. It’s in the eyes, the voice, this swelling song that warms up from the toes and tingles with endless possibilities. Things change when you care enough to grab whatever you love, and give it everything.

–Amanda Burr, student at the Walnut Hill School

I have been known to think – and write:

Everyone is a leader.

and to think of it as a responsibility to develop in ourselves the traits, talents and strengths of our leadership and to share ourselves with the world: to be the change, to lead.

Yet, this young woman, a high school student at a school for the arts, suggests that: Continue reading “Leadership is a Gift”

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How do you limit yourself with either/or?

Think about it. How often do you fixate on “the way” or “the right choice”? When you know like this, do you notice that you can quickly list all the reasons why “this” is right and “that” is wrong? This way of thinking can drive a wedge between two people in relationship, each of whom thinks they are right and other is wrong. In business this can show up, for example, in one group focusing solely on quality, regardless of price, and the other insisting on cost control.

How do we move beyond these stuck points?

Continue reading “How do you limit yourself with either/or?”

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Flexibility

Flexibility, bending and stretching without breaking, is a valuable asset. In order to create the changes we desire in life, we must try new things, step outside our comfort zone, reach for something different. Imagine the rubber band. If not stretched enough, it isn’t very useful. If left unused, never stretched, it hardens and loses its “stretchability”. If we stretch it too far, it snaps. Somewhere in the middle, the stretching gives the rubber band its value.

What about you? In what areas of life have you flexed to the breaking point? In what areas are you afraid to stretch? Where have you become inflexible and rigid, hardened and ready to crumble?

What shift in flexibility is called for?