Life Guidance Archives - Page 34 of 56 - Inward Journey Life Coaching

March 22, 2016March 17, 2016

Separate or Among? You get to choose!

Imagine you in your life – in the activities you do, at work, within your family, in your volunteer commitments – anywhere that you are in the presence of a group of people. Close your eyes and put yourself there now. In your mind’s eye, what do you see?

Are you physically present and emotionally absent?
Are you physically present but off to one side as the judgmental onlooker?
Are you physically present but lonely or depressed and assuming that no one cares?
Are you deeply engaged, perhaps to the point of taking over the controls?

Perhaps you’ve been all of these at various times! How do they work for you? Likely, not too well. These ways of being, of seeing ourselves, don’t feel good and certainly don’t result in our personal best having an impact on the world around us.

Consider another way: always among. It is a choice we make each and every time we enter into relationship with the world around us. We can choose:

to see ourselves as separate: thinking and feeling our way into isolation or into control over others
to see ourselves as one among many: collaborators on this life journey, supporting one another, sharing personal gifts and talents for the good of the whole, sometimes leading, sometimes encouraging, sometimes just doing what needs to be done

Notice where you show up as separate. Experiment with an intention of among. See each person as an individual contributor to an interconnected whole. Each is one among many serving something greater than their personal agendas. Then ask:

What are we creating?
What is their contribution?
What am I to offer now?

What does it feel like to be among?

March 20, 2016March 16, 2016

A Knowing I Deny

How often do you find yourself saying:

I was afraid that would happen!
I had a sense this choice wasn’t the right one.
I knew it!

Every one of us comes into this world complete with a strong intuition, a sense beyond the standard five senses of sight, hearing, touch, taste and smell. The sixth sense which used to sound so elusive and available only to psychics and other out there folks (who some of us thought were crazy and untrustworthy!), is actually standard on all human vehicles. If you don’t believe me, think again about those phrases above. How did you know it? You didn’t know by way of your intelligence, you knew because you sensed it, your intuition was speaking to you!

The problem?
You, like many of us, ignored the message!

In some cultures, intuition is vital and honored. I think about the Native Americans who walked the earth fully listening to her messages. They knew so many things without the benefit of the TV weatherman or the Internet, without deep, rational thought. They just knew.

In other cultures, intuition is trained out of us. Early on, as we move in the world with our sensitive knowingness on display, we are told to ignore it. “You don’t feel that way!” or “It’s okay. Go to Grandpa.” Later in life, imagine telling your supervisor, “We need to do it this way – I just sense that this is the right direction.” How will your supervisor respond?

Today, I just want to invite you into a relationship with your intuition, to notice when there is a knowing you deny. For starters, just notice. Become familiar with your sixth sense and begin to honor it with, “Oh! I did know that … and I ignored it this time.” Notice how you knew it. Does your gut get tense? Do you get a headache? Does fear show up? However it is that your intuition speaks to you, begin to remain aware of the messenger and, when it shows up, rather than ignoring it, stop. Pause. Say, “I hear you.” and get curious. “What are you trying to tell me?” Listen for the answer. Then make an informed choice about how you will proceed in the situation.

What is the knowing you deny?
What if you honored it instead?

March 18, 2016March 19, 2016

Are you ready for rainbow swirl?

Take a moment to think about the world you live, play and work within. Browse your outer world, but survey also your inner world, the beliefs and ideas you allow to impact your choices. If your world was ice cream, would it be plain vanilla? Succulent strawberry? Charming chocolate? Maybe it’s a bit of all three and you’ve got Neapolitan going on!

If you do move around in Neapolitan, are you segregated:

allowing some ideas and beliefs in one area of your life but not another, showing up some places as plain vanilla and others as succulent strawberry?

Today, imagine expanding your scope, the colors and flavors and style that you play with on your life journey. Imagine you added orange sherbet, pistachio or rainbow swirl:

What is possible with a bit more color?
What magic will you create with orange sherbet?
What will your rainbow swirl stir up?

March 16, 2016March 14, 2016

How do you show up as a leader?

Each one of us is a leader. For some of us, our leadership is formal and acknowledged by the world around us; we are team leaders or managers or CEOs at our place of employment. Yet all of us, simply by being a member of the human race, by being part of a family or group of friends, are leaders. Someone, somewhere, is watching and learning from us whether we know it or not.

Think about that. Your actions, your words, the very energy you bring to each interaction – YOU are being watched and emulated.

How do you show up as a leader?
Are you willing to find out …
… and take responsibility for your impact?

We’ve all heard those famous words, “Be the change.” But do you know that being the change we want to see in this world begins at home, in you and in me? Being the change requires that we see ourselves as leaders who care enough to learn what our impact is and take responsibility for its ripple effect.

Today, I am challenging you to look deeply at one area in your life where you impact others. Then, learn about your impact by getting courageous and asking those who feel your leadership impact to help you be a better leader. For those who are willing to be honest with you, ask these powerful questions:

How do I show up as a leader (or partner, friend, parent)?
Where do I fail as a leader?
What is my unintended impact?

Our actions always have unintended impact. Growing up, my desire to do well in school, to perform well on stage, to be “good”, had the unintended impact of me being thought of as a snob! I didn’t know that until years later when someone got honest with me. When my leadership colleagues reflected on my playing small and scared as a leader, I heard, “Your unintended impact is …”:

You create disconnection.
Smallness enters the space.
Your magnificent voice is not heard.

That’s pretty powerful impact of the kind I didn’t mean to bring with my leadership!

What is the unintended impact YOU create?

March 14, 2016March 14, 2016