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The Space …

I’ve been struggling. So much going on. So much action and reaction. So many emotions. So strong. So much confusion. So much pain. So much anger.

I have lost myself in all of it. Can you relate? Maybe not. But just in case you can, I offer these lyrics. They suggest some focus on and resting within the spaces – the spaces between stimulus and response, between emotion and reaction, between the in breath and the out breath, between each thought. It is in the space, the silence, where we encounter our truth and the courage to live it.

In The Space

In the space, in the space between each task…
In the space when I take the time to ask…
In that space, that precious space, I relax.

In the space, in the space between my words…
In the space where I pause and breathe, discern…
In that space, that sacred space, I learn.

In the space, in the space between my thoughts…
In the space where I know I am not lost…
In that space, that peaceful place, I am taught.

In the space, in the space between my fears…
In the space where I feel pure love, so dear…
In that space, in sweet embrace, I hear.

In the space, in the silence of my soul…
In the space, I’ve released my false control.
In this space, this resting place, I am whole.

                                   Jeanne Loehnis, 2008

What awaits you in the space?
What if you spent time there?
What would shift in you? 

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Pink highlights

bubblewrap

This morning, the sky was covered in grey clouds that appeared like bubble wrap. A moment later, I noticed pink highlights across the cloud expanse. There were small, faint sightings of pink in addition to the brilliant glow closer to the horizon. How my eyes caught those highlights! I was drawn to focus on the “beauty”, that which was different, that which I’d judged “worthy” of my attention.

And It was then that I realized I’d virtually ignored the grey clouds. They didn’t catch my eye until the highlights appeared. Of course, the highlights would have been impossible without the texture of the grey clouds!

What do you focus on?
What do you ignore?
What deserves your attention?

What are the highlights pointing you towards?

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Old Stories

How often do you tell yourself “old stories” – those messages we give ourselves which usually begin like:

“I can’t do that …”
“That never works for me because …”
“If I do that, then …”
“That will make me feel …”

Such stories most often project negative outcomes. To avoid the undesirable result, we avoid the action.

One of my most overused “old stories” is around evening commitments. When I face multiple evening commitments in a row, my story is “If I do all of these, I’ll be tired, won’t have enough down time, get overwhelmed, …” That old story could keep me from time with friends, activities which will be entertaining, and just maybe some really good times! What if they energized me? What if I learned that I need less down time? What if they opened my eyes to new possibilities?

What old story are you rehashing?
In what ways are you limiting yourself?
What rewrite is possible?

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Real or Nice?

Today’s bit is not new to me but I recently heard it again and if feels good to share. Do you find yourself “being nice” at times, rather than “being real”?

What causes you to choose “nice”?
When does the choice serve you?
When doesn’t it?

The sub-statement in what I read this week hit me and went like this:

My biggest fear is that everyone I know will be in the same room at the same time and I won’t know who to be.

What part of that statement is true for you? Which situations or relationships cause you to distort or silence yourself? Which situations or relationships cause you to say YES when you mean NO or vice versa?

Now what will you do with what you know?

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Choice

In case you hadn’t realized it, life has a HUGE component around “choice”. There is great freedom (and, yes, responsibility) in becoming aware of the choices we have and moving from old default behaviors or the victim stance to making personal, empowered choices.

Sometimes the hardest thing is believing we actually have a choice in the matter. Have you ever said things like: “That’s just what Mom’s do.” or “I could never let him down.” or “I have to do that.”?

The next time you feel trapped or realize you are in the midst of something you really don’t want to experience, dare to stop and ask:

What options do I have?
Who (or which voice in my head) says I have to?
What about this choice feels right?
What doesn’t?
What am I willing to risk to choose differently?

 In the end, you may proceed with your original choice – or not!

Does it feel any different – knowing that it is a choice?